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Review of some places I visited in Ibadan

Twenty one years in Lagos and I grew up believing that there was no life beyond Lagos until I decided to take the bold step and move beyond Lagos. Stay with me to the end as I have listed and reviewed some of the places I visited in Ibadan.

Now playing: swaggu by yusufkanbai

I overlooked my travel phobia and motion sickness and embarked on a two-hour evening trip to Ibadan, six days here and I have realized that Lagos is designed to shorten our lifespan. I searched for at least thirty minutes traffic in Ibadan so I’ll be assured that Lagos wasn’t totally running me mad but alas!!! No traffic.

Even the rain wasn’t half as aggressive here as it has been in Lagos.

I’m now in the very best position to tell my dear readers, most of who reside in Lagos to travel out of that city once in a while just to wind off and experience the peace that comes with not being stuck in traffic and eating amala undilutedly made with peace and love.

The kind of amala you’d enjoy without getting angry if you try to drag shaki with your teeth and it splashes soup into your eyes. That’s the kind of amala I’m talking about.

WEDNESDAY

Don’t ask where Monday and Tuesday went because I slept all day on Tuesday.

If you feel the need to also be adventurous, please visit Bowers tower if you’re claustrophobic and experience what it’s like to be in a horror movie.

You can tell from the pain in my eyes that the journey that led to taking this picture was not funny. After eating that beautiful amala from Amala skye, my host decided that he was going to take me to bowers tower because he wanted me to be in touch with history. I honestly would have opted for sleep but I couldn’t resist not spending my host’s money so I agreed and so began the journey that took four of us to that tower. After climbing the hill and walking the long road that led to the tower, we finally made it into the compound where the tower stands only to find out that the stairs are really tiny and the flight up was quite long and slow. For every step I took, I said prayers that went like “God abeg, don’t let these walls close in on me, don’t let that door lock and don’t let these stairs give way under me. God, please I’m begging you, you know I don’t watch horror movies, don’t let me star in one.” I was the most scared than I had ever been in my life because the stairs were never ending.

We eventually made it up but my paranoid state refused to let my body calm down. The view was great, it was a 360 view of the whole city and I could have sworn I saw Unilag but I couldn’t afford to let my guard down because I didn’t trust the tower to not collapse.

The rest of the guys were making the most out of it and creating memories but not me because I just wanted to get to the ground again and when we did, I walked as fast as my legs could take me. I was laughed at but I preferred that, really.

I’m pretty sure that if my host says it from his point of view, you’d think we went to heaven because perspectives play very important roles in storytelling. It was that same day that WhatsApp, Instagram and Facebook were down so I visited the coldstone at bodija and compensated myself for the horror I had experienced earlier.

THURSDAY

Thursday evening had me at the the arcade at Ventura mall.

We tried something that we ordinarily wouldn’t try in Lagos. We said “let’s go to the mall” ordered Taxify and got to the mall in less than ten minutes. I kept on saying “wow” because as a sane person in Lagos, even if you lived behind the mall, you had to make proper plans and leave your house hours before the stipulated time because traffic could build up unexpectedly in front of your gate.

Safe to say that I had fun without being worried that I was going to have to face traffic on my way back home. Life is good when you don’t end up spending half of your day in traffic and all your money on transport.

FRIDAY

If you ever want to eat breakfast and get full, be sure to visit Oliver’s cafe. I was so sure before I saw the pancakes that I was going to ask for another round but halfway through the pancakes, my stomach was already acting full but I loosened my shorts and lived up to my nickname – baby elephant.

This breakfast knocked me out till 3pm.

SATURDAY

I visited Agodi gardens. I’m never going there again.

My blogger friend – Yeychi picked me up later that afternoon and took me to ParisBakery and I kid you not, they had amala alongside their icecream and cake. If you looked closely, you’d also see rice and stew.

 

If you love pure sugar, please order anything from this bakery. I had never had problems finishing icecream until I tasted this one. Never again dear God.

If you ever need an affordable restaurant where you can go on dates, please start with cafe Chrystalis.

SUNDAY

I’m in Lagos and I’m in tears because I entered Lagos and became unfresh. The best you people can do for me now is answer the following questions in the comment section.

DON’T I DESERVE TO LEAVE THIS LAGOS?

 

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO IBADAN?

 

HAVE YOU TASTED AMALA IN IBADAN? YOU NEED TO TASTE IT TO KNOW THAT I’M NOT BEING OVERLY DRAMATIC.

 

WHAT ARE THE BEST OUT OF LAGOS CITIES TO VISIT?

 

I am not such a fan of waist trainers

You people did not even tell me that this waist trainer life is hard.

Few weeks ago, StyleSenami forced me to buy a waist trainer from Jumia since I had refused to see through my plan of going to the gym, I felt so too.

I got my waist trainer weeks ago and I never got around opening the package. I just knew that I had a waist trainer lying around in my box.

Today I decided to try this dress I got as a gift from Jane Michaels last year and I decided to try it with the waist trainer.

First of all, the process of wearing a waist trainer is work in itself, I perspired like I had just come out of the bathroom because Lagos is on a whole different level of ‘hot’ at the moment. This waist trainer has to be wrapped twice for you to get the achieved results but I realized that if I wrapped it twice, Instablog’s headline would read ‘Girl on blue faints in public due to the tightness of the waist trainer nobody sent her to wear’ with a picture of me sprawled on the floor struggling to breath so I wrapped it once and got my mammary glands spilling out of the clothes and my waist snatched anyway.

Ladies and gentlemen, that picture might look like whatever you think it is but I couldn’t breath, I promise. Those things make you walk as if you’re proud and as if you have money and I honestly need to know how you lots that wear these things regularly, live with yourselves.

It didn’t help that I was hungry and I had to eat but I couldn’t because my intestines were caving in. It looked like modesty and home training to the ones that offered me food but I was really hungry and dying to remove this thing.

Hafeezah on the other hand, was as free as a bird seeing that she had nothing holding her down.

She helped zip up that dress so she is partly to blame for my discomfort.

Eitherways, I realize now that ‘snatched waist’ is not my portion as I cannot survive this hardship.

If you people want me to be fit, hire a personal trainer for me. If not, let’s be looking at ourselves.

LADIES, EVER HAD ANY EXPERIENCE WITH WAIST TRAINERS?

 

WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST TIME LIKE?

 

GUYS, EVER ENCOUNTERED ANY LADY WITH WAIST TRAINERS? HOW DID YOU FEEL?

 

WHO ELSE IS WITH ME ON THIS ‘I CAN’T COME AND KILL MYSELF JOURNEY?

 

Dear Content Creators, stand your ground.

The easiest thing to do as a content creator is to be swayed by promises by people who would rather offer everything else but payment for the services you have provided.

I actually did wake up at 2am to write but since my throbbing head has other plans for me, I slept back and woke up at 4am. I can shake my head up and down now and hope that it stays shakable tomorrow.

Now playing: the playlist this idiot made for me. No, I won’t share, I’ll just be putting up the picture of the one who has my heart completely.

Between the last time we talked on this blog and now, I dyed my hair, watched the whole season of SEX EDUCATION and the two seasons of DYNASTY.

I was up most on most nights completely neglecting writing on this blog and doing ‘one more episode and I’ll write’.

Guess who one more episode herself to the very end of the series?

We need a season three and we need it fast!!!

Either ways, dear creatives/content creators that do not know how to place value on what they do, what’s the problem? Is it that you’re unsure or you feel like you’re not worthy to have value?

I ask this because I heard a whole web/app developer beat himself up in front of a potential client in order to seem humble.

He stuttered, he stammered and most of all, he wasn’t sure of how good he was.

The phrases ‘I could’ and ‘’maybe’ fell out his mouth so much that I almost walked up to him and gave him a resounding slap.

He had some pretty good jobs to his name but he didn’t value himself enough to see them as ‘good jobs’ and I watched as he was painfully priced from 100k to 30k because he seemed unsure of himself.

It was more painful than seeing Cristal Carrington die.

I’d never stop asking you to value yourself first before any other person values you. This way, nobody can ride you because they’d realize that they need you more than you need them.

Don’t be afraid to put a price on yourself because you want to seem nice and cheap unless nice and cheap can fund your lifestyle because you’ll most definitely be priced to nothingness even when you’re cheap. Price yourself knowing that your piggybank needs to be fed everyday and it cannot be fed with an empty account. This is my motivation.

Reminds me of the very time someone cut 80% off my budget for a job and told me ‘just accept this one, there will be more jobs in the future and we’ll put you on the list.’

God forbid, dear.

I was broke but I honestly refused to sell myself short and lose on both ends because I wanted to please people with my money in their pockets; because if 80% of the budget could be cut now, what was the guarantee that I’d even get paid at all next time?

What was the assurance that the next time a better job came up, I wouldn’t be called and priced to the level of disorientation simply because they know that I’d settle for just anything?

God forbid bad thing!

So dear creatives who want to make a difference and get paid while at it, place value on yourself knowing that they need you more than you need them because they’d have learnt it if they didn’t need you.

While you’re at it, ensure that you know how to deliver what is expected of you too because you’ll put yourself in a position of ‘see finish’ and lose your integrity.

I have tried for you.

HAVE YOU SEEN ANY OF THE TWO SERIES MENTIONED ABOVE

 

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN UNDERPRICED BY A CLIENT? SHARE YOUR EXPERIENCES.

 

ARE YOU ACTUALLY NICE OR YOU JUST DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE WORTH?

 

HOW HAVE YOU UTILIZED THIS STRIKE TO YOUR FAVOUR?

 

DO YOU HAVE YOUR PVC, DEAR?