Hey, Your friends are a reflection of who you really are!!!

Yes, you’ve heard it before and I’m saying it again.

Your friends are a reflection of who you are.

Now playing: Sound it – SMJ ft IBK

Often times, I get a lot of flattering messages about my friends and I and how we take advantage of everything at our disposal to push and encourage each other. I beam with pride but then again, these things don’t happen in a day.

I have, over the past five years made friends who have either contributed to my life or taken from me.

No. Not money.

Value.

I’m not one to make a lot of friends even though I know a lot of people. Reasons being that:

• I don’t want to get poisoned, any way possible.

• I don’t like unnecessary stress.

• I hate unnecessary stress.

• I want to be around people that can help me grow even when I’m being lazy.

• I don’t like selfish people.

When I remember more reasons, I’ll post them on my Instagram.

These questions from TheCultureFit will be a guide as to how you and your friends can be strong off each other.

I’d be making a lot of personal references so forgive me.

How do I find friends to form my own squad?

This is quite tricky because I don’t think anybody gets into friendship with the aim of being a squad. It’s something that just happens along the line but if the long term plan is to be a squad and remain so, the trick is to find people of like minds but with different perspectives towards life because this would help broaden your thoughts and will teach you tolerance. You have to find out that it’s fine for everybody not to agree with your opinion and it will totally be fine, unless you want a squad that would constantly applaud your excesses and bow before you at your will.

For example, I have very creative friends with different talents, when we come together with the aim of brainstorming, that’s when we begin to understand why we’re friends.

How does everyone put the other person before themselves?

It’s a question of how selfless you can be. If you’re in that friendship to help each other grow, of course it would come easy. It’s a clear case of ‘If one person wins, we applaud the loudest’ because we are first proud to be friends with that person and we realize that our applause would motivate others to stand up and applaud. If one person does something bad, the rest of us cower our heads in shame so we’d also raise our heads up high while we carry each other on our shoulders knowing that a team player scored.

How do you all manage to hold each other down and protect your interests as a team?

The devil will not put us to shame in Jesus name. At this point, it just comes naturally because we’ve been through too much together to not hold each other down.

Behind the scenes, we fight a lot and attempt to break up because of one small mistake but of course every team has that one person that oversees as the elder, who would take out the time to talk sense into us one after the other.

We first imagine how our lives will be without each other and then how beautiful our lives would remain and improve with each other and we realize that it’s something we cannot lose, so we hug and kiss ourselves and renew our vows.

This works because I do not have toxic friends. I have friends who are willing to slap me from my daydream and bring me back to the reality of what I’m supposed to be doing to achieve my dreams.

That being said, if you have toxic friends, you’re punishing yourself.

How do you all bare yourselves out to each other without the fear of being judged.

This is where the trust factor comes into play because why do you have friends who would readily jump at the first opportunity to judge you?

We talk a lot and we all have our different roles to play individually.

I’m most definitely the last person anybody would come and meet to tell that they got drunk and fell into the gutter. I will laugh. A lot. Like a whole lot.

I’m also the very last person who’d accept that you’ve had your very first taste of alcohol because it takes me really long to process such information. I’ll just be living in denial but you can always come and meet me when you have issues pertaining to your mental, emotional and physical well being. I can die for you in these cases.

In very extreme cases where we now have to collectively bare ourselves to each other, we either do it physically or on the group chat and if you’re not going to help in any way, it’s best you just shut up because everybody will face you.

When you consider all being made the center of attraction in such situation, your head will become correct, you’d remove every form of judgement from your feelings.

How do you stay supporting each other 100%?

We have become so used to it now. A lot of times we don’t even give our 100% but because a lot of people that see us are fascinated by the idea of us as friends, they get to think that everything is rosy.

There are days that we slack, there are also days that we get selfish but we of course do not let it becloud our sense of reasoning.

We love each other first, we understand each other and we act like we’re all we’ve got, we annoy each other a lot, sometimes a little too much that it becomes baffling.

We correct each other in love and we try to keep each other on our toes because we’re moved by what we see so we ensure that we let the team see that there’s no room for slacking.

Sometimes we’re childish, but hey, we’re only humans after all.

WHAT ARE YOUR FRIENDS SAYING ABOUT YOU?

DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE ‘SHOW ME YOUR FRIENDS AND I’LL TELL YOU WHO YOU ARE’ PHRASE?

ARE YOU YOUR FRIEND’S FRIEND?

DO YOU SUPPORT YOUR FRIENDS OR YOU JUST WANT THEM TO SUPPORT YOU FOR NOTHING IN RETURN?

DO YOU PATRONIZE YOUR FRIENDS?

DO YOU TALK TO YOUR FRIENDS?

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28 Comments

  1. Ololade Adekanle January 8, 2019 at 4:20 am

    You always spill the truth everytime Osas. There\’s nothing better than having friends who have similar goals with you.
    I have a really small circle of friends, but they all are the best.

    Reply
    1. osas January 8, 2019 at 10:50 am

      Hold them tight

      Reply
  2. Tomiwa January 8, 2019 at 4:42 am

    Lots of good points you’ve put down there. I have 3 girls that I call my best friends. We all have different personalities and what not but we are always there for each other, we spit out the truth when we have to even though we know we might hurt each other, we support each other when we need to and can do so and that’s what keeps us strong and going. It’s been 8 years and counting and it’s the best.

    Reply
  3. Tobee Awosika January 8, 2019 at 6:44 am

    Thank you mommy for this lecture. I\’ll remember it!❤

    Reply
    1. osas January 8, 2019 at 10:49 am

      Kip us 2geda

      Reply
  4. Edwin Udofia January 8, 2019 at 7:29 am

    Thank you Osas, this is something we all need to learn.

    Reply
  5. Ghost January 8, 2019 at 7:45 am

    This is the reality people don\’t like to face. You\’ll annoy each other as friends, rip each other\’s hair out, and help each other find wigs to hide your shame. Friendship is deeper than the occasional misunderstandings.

    Reply
  6. Anjorin Molayo January 8, 2019 at 8:19 am

    Thank you for this, OSAS. I learnt from this a lot.

    Reply
  7. Cheche January 8, 2019 at 8:25 am

    This friends things is hard especially when you are considering talented/skillful, its hard to tell who is friend or who wants to just hange for what you can offer.

    I feel most people I know are the later, but that might be my pride speaking so I consider all of them as friends.

    Reply
    1. osas January 8, 2019 at 10:46 am

      It’s a risk worth taking

      Reply
  8. Evang.wunmi January 8, 2019 at 8:57 am

    Absolutely true…I really believe in show me your friends and I will tell you who you are…I have just two friends and they are the best I could ever have had …I\’ve always been a selfless person while in sec school and I was always on the giving side and never received the same amount of love I gave back but getting to the uni I met these two girls who transformed my life …I was always receiving love from them without them expecting anything in return …We pray and fast together…its really great knowing people got your back…I hope they could see this!!

    Reply
  9. osas January 8, 2019 at 10:25 am

    Mood!!

    Reply
  10. osas January 8, 2019 at 10:49 am

    Lmao whaaaat

    Reply
  11. osas January 8, 2019 at 11:52 am

    RITWIT!!!

    Reply
  12. StyleSenami January 8, 2019 at 2:15 pm

    I’m grateful for the friends I have even though we found each other late, life had been amazing with them.

    Reply
    1. osas January 8, 2019 at 4:01 pm

      You’re so romantic

      Reply
  13. Kine January 8, 2019 at 2:33 pm

    i think I\’ve got the best set of people to call friends. thank you for all you do Osas. *inserts purple heart*

    Reply
    1. osas January 8, 2019 at 4:02 pm

      Love you *inserts purple heart*

      Reply
  14. Chidinma January 8, 2019 at 6:37 pm

    I really love what you\’ve written, I know there\’s no big deal in what I\’m to say, but I just have a few questions and I\’m hoping you\’ll have the answer… So I\’ve had a bestie for like 5 years now, we were literally like twins in our first two years of the relationship, then we started breaking unconsciously to the extent, we hardly have any heart to heart conversations, if she has any issue she hardly shares it with me but rather with our closest friend, both of them are closer, I\’ve been really depressed because of this, I\’ve been trying to bring back that spark in the relationship but it\’s failed, I don\’t know if I should call it quits or just keep pretending like we\’re fine when we\’re not?

    Reply
    1. osas January 8, 2019 at 8:39 pm

      I don’t think she wants to reignite the spark. I totally understand that you don’t want to give it up but talk to her one more time if she doesn’t want you, you might need to move on while letting her know that you’ll always be there for her

      Reply
  15. Greatness January 8, 2019 at 7:52 pm

    A lot of people need to see this❤️

    Reply
    1. osas January 8, 2019 at 8:38 pm

      Please share it to them

      Reply
  16. Aduni January 8, 2019 at 9:33 pm

    Too bad.. I don\’t have friends..I know a lot of people but I can\’t call them friends.. Most of them don\’t even understand what I do… I envy you a lot tho.. You got creative friends that got your back and support you… Thumbs up girl.. Wish to be a better writer like you tho

    Reply
  17. Ruru January 9, 2019 at 9:54 am

    I’m really happy to be in a squad just like the one you’ve spoken about. I’m totally around the best people. I can’t be thankful to God enough, you know having friends who constantly want to know what your plan for life is, is just the most beautiful thing. God bless my friends. ❤️❤️

    Reply
  18. Foluso January 10, 2019 at 2:20 am

    Insightful as always. Now I gotta look through the phonebook to make my own squad

    Reply
    1. osas January 10, 2019 at 6:50 pm

      Lmao add me dear

      Reply

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