I’m Almost Too Fine For All These

Photocredit: __dce

Ever sat down to wonder why you actually wanted to grow up? Yeah. Me too. It was my NIMC challenge that brought out this thought in me.

One fateful Wednesday, I had decided that I was going to skip classes, like I always do, to go to the bank with my mom and have her transfer my account to me.
I had been saying it since I turned eighteen but that Wednesday, I decided I was going to be a doer.
So off to the bank I went with my mom. So that you wont vex too much, this bank whose name I would not mention is a bank for old people; they still retain people above forty in that bank – I kid you not. Everyone that works in that particular branch is way above thirty-five, including their security men and cleaners. The whole set up made me wonder where they put all the fresh graduates from the finance section. Our fresh graduates probably are somewhere surviving as entrepreneurs or social media influencers; that is where the money is anyways.

So, into the bank I went, with my mom trailing behind me because she likes to watch my back, and I could have sworn that everyone in the bank stopped working for a minute and took that minute to stare at me.

‘Who was this corporately dressed razzite with colored hair?’
‘Is that her mom?’
‘How is her mom okay with this?’
‘What does she want in our bank?’
‘We’re too cooperate for this kind of person’.

But no oh! Nobody said any of those words with their mouths; their eyes did the talking. I doubt anyone would have the mind to actually confront me about my hair in front of my mom sha.

It was unfortunate that we got the agent with the attitude to attend to us, she practically answered us with her mouth twisted to the other side of her face, I got disgusted by the fact that she dropped the act and picked up another when she found out that my mom couldn’t hear. Please, why?

She had told us that it would be impossible to have her transfer my own account to me without my national ID card, same ID card that I never got around to getting because of the silly excuses of the people they put in charge of it in my school: ‘Sorry, no light today, come when NASU is settled’ or ‘Sorry, we’re not working this week, come last week’.

This is how far I am from getting my national ID

To say that I was disgusted by the thought of having to stand in line for my National ID would be understated. It was thought provoking and I decided that I was going to dedicate my whole day to doing it.
Luckily for me, there was a center nearby. I had skipped to the center in excitement hoping that nothing would deter me from at least passing first stage. I didn’t get close enough to explain why I was there before I got told off by the attendant that “We’re not doing again today, come tomorrow.”

You’re not doing again at 11am? I should come tomorrow from my school to this fagba to do National ID card?

Are you funny?

Do you know that I can swear for you?

Do you think that if I was still twelve, I would be here standing in front of you trying to fulfill my national requirement?

Will you be telling me this if I was born abroad?

God will definitely judge you.

This picture is not in anyway related to this post, this is just an excuse to show my fine face. Continue reading

I think I’ll just try getting my PVC first, and hopefully, I don’t get told off.

Have you gotten your national ID card yet?
How was the process like for you?
PVC nko?
Share your experiences in the comment section.

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21 Comments

  1. Adetoun March 6, 2018 at 6:33 pm

    I have not and I dread the thought of the stress il go through! Tho I registered online already

    Reply
    1. osas March 6, 2018 at 11:09 pm

      Registered online for which one?

      Reply
  2. Feezah March 6, 2018 at 7:18 pm

    I\’m kuku not a citizen of this country, no need for National ID. It\’s not me they\’ll use stress to kill

    Reply
  3. Ruru March 6, 2018 at 8:46 pm

    I’ve not gotten, I’m very angry with the country and I have somethings to tell the president. Thanks

    Reply
  4. bolaji March 6, 2018 at 10:19 pm

    u are obsessed with urself in a good way sha,i seriously can\’t believe u pulled off the hair though,I don\’t even think I have the chill for the id card process

    Reply
    1. osas March 6, 2018 at 10:26 pm

      Lol, if I\’m not obsessed with myself, who will be? You\’ll still have to go through the process sha

      Reply
  5. Leo Okwudiafor March 6, 2018 at 10:21 pm

    test

    Reply
    1. osas March 6, 2018 at 10:39 pm

      ….

      Reply
  6. osas March 6, 2018 at 11:09 pm

    You don\’t know how lucky you are but I\’ll tell you. You\’re very lucky!!! You don\’t have to go through rejections in 2018

    Reply
  7. osas March 6, 2018 at 11:09 pm

    I swear down

    Reply
  8. Young Valiant March 7, 2018 at 11:40 am

    I\’ve tried a million times to get these national identity cards. All to no avail. The process ain\’t that tedious but the people attending to you are the problem. Sluggards, real sluggards. Crazy fellows. Transferring their annoyance on innocent souls.
    Just so stressful.

    Reply
    1. osas March 7, 2018 at 2:01 pm

      The power is in their hands, so they feel like they\’re gods at that moment. I have a lot of things to tell them mehn

      Reply
    1. osas March 8, 2018 at 11:32 am

      Lol

      Reply
  9. lope March 9, 2018 at 11:27 am

    although, i have eye defeat and the lord is so good to me, i can see it well. i am not sorry

    Reply
  10. lope March 9, 2018 at 11:31 am

    i am literally not a citizen of this nation,. nothing to show for it, they cannot comman kill me for my future babies(twins).i am planning my way to america already, only that i still have to be a citizen to escape this so-good country…..

    Reply
    1. osas March 9, 2018 at 2:33 pm

      Exactly!! You have to go through all these stress to leave

      Reply
  11. Ifechi March 9, 2018 at 11:36 am

    Looooool

    Reply
  12. Style Senami March 9, 2018 at 6:23 pm

    I’ve gotten my national i.d card although I did the whole registration for 3 weeks. Would have given up but my mum kept pushing me. Besides you inspire me a lot, your blog is always fun to read
    P.s: I’m dyeing my hair soon, joining your gang. Love from this side ❤️

    Reply
  13. osas March 15, 2018 at 8:55 am

    Please I want reliable contact to because I don\’t think I can handle this stress of wanting to be identified as a Nigerian

    Reply
  14. osas December 21, 2018 at 9:12 pm

    Guess what: I lost my temporary voters card

    Reply

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